Overlooked Truths in Proverbs 31

We need a better understanding of Proverbs 31. This passage of Scripture has been twisted, abused, and taken out of context for many years, and too many women have been left feeling inadequate because they don't do every single thing listed. I'd like to say clearly that the Holy Spirit did not inspire this part of the Bible to leave women feeling discouraged! 

The true meaning of the passage of Proverbs 31 is beautiful, but too often it has been used to reprimand women for not "doing it all," or not doing more, or to try and tell women that their only role in society should be inside the home. Most of us read it as a checklist of things we need to or 'should' do. Select wool and flax. Hire servants. Buy a field. Plant a vineyard. Sew clothes. Make a quilt. Gather food. Cook. Stay up late. Get up early. Help the poor. Have energy. Show strength. Make items to sell in the marketplace. It seems like a bit much.

But...it's a poem. It was never meant as an itinerary for all women, everywhere, throughout history. I believe that the many different activities are listed to demonstrate that being a woman of valor can look like a lot of different things! And it shows that all of these jobs, many of which are not glamorous, or are not praised in our culture, have significance. The range of activities in this poem celebrate the various professions, skills, hobbies, and value of women from all walks of life.

We should also note that Proverbs 31 isn't even directed at women. Verse 1 says that the Queen (likely Bathsheba, as "King Lemuel," is thought be Solomon, since the word lemuel means "for God") taught this saying to her son. She wasn't saying it to her daughters to tell them that a woman of valor had to do all these things. This wasn't a checklist. She was saying this to her son. I believe she did this to teach him to recognize that valor and value can come in many different forms. 

This poem calls attention to tasks that need done, but aren't necessarily noticed by those who don't do them. How many times have you gotten up early or stayed up late to attend to the work at hand and felt like no one noticed your effort? Have you worked to be generous to the poor, contribute to ministries, or provide for your family only to have your efforts feel taken for granted or downplayed? 

Proverbs 31 is not just about commercial undertakings, parenting, and homemaking either. It's not about resume building or interesting quips to put in a biography. It highlights specific character traits. Being able to laugh, acting with dignity, speaking with wisdom, generosity, and fearing YHWH are all celebrated in this passage of Scripture. The Queen was pointing out that these traits should be valued and respected!

This Bible passage is a reminder to all of us, but men in particular, not to take for granted the significant work done by women of valor. This is why the last verse says, "Honor her for all that she has done." Proverbs 31 calls us to recognize the character and resilience of the women in our lives. 

Related posts:
The Truth About 1 Corinthians 14
Five Books That Changed My Understanding of Scripture
A Hebraic Perspective on a Woman of Valor