What Is Written: Modesty

We should dress modestly and sensibly when we pray. -1 Timothy 2:9 - what Scripture says about modesty
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"Likewise, the women, when they pray, should be dressed modestly and sensibly in respectable attire, not with elaborate hairstyles and gold jewelry, or pearls, or expensive clothes." -1 Timothy 2:9

What kind of modesty does this verse refer to?

The common understanding is that Paul meant women should cover their bodies. A bikini is obviously not an appropriate choice for a congregational setting. That makes sense. I'm not aruging that women shouldn't be appropriately dressed. But if that's his point why doesn't the verse go more like this:

"Women should dress modestly and sensibly in respectable clothes, not with low-cut tops, short skirts, or spandex outfits."

Am I alone in thinking that would be a better fit for the first part of the verse?

"Not with elaborate hairstyles and gold jewelry, or pearls, or expensive clothes."

What if Paul meant financial modesty?

Expensive means the clothes cost a lot of money. As do gold jewelry, and real pearls. An elaborate hairstyle implies you are wealthy enough to pay someone to do your hair--whether a hired stylist or a servant--or at least that you are wealthy enough to have plenty of free time to do it yourself.

Think of a time you felt conspicuously under dressed. What was that like? Stressful? Humiliating? My husband and I were once riding an elevator in a fancy Chicago hotel to a restaurant a few floors up. Aware of the ambiance of the hotel we had dressed up--at least we thought so. The elevator made a stop before our destination and we were joined by several couples who were in ball gowns and tuxedos. I had never felt so out of place or embarrassed.

Once we discovered the other couples were headed to a formal ball a few stories up, we were able to laugh it off (really, it was a very audible sigh of relief). But I remember the stress that gripped me of being awkwardly out of place, like I didn't belong.

And I was just going to dinner. Imagine if that happened to someone seeking the presence of YHWH.

Is Paul instructing us not to dress like we have lots of money? You know how it is, ladies. Fashion is a contest, or at least a clique. We notice how other people dress and worry what they'll think of our outfit. We see what popular women are wearing and make a mental note to track down a floral dress or a striped top so that we can emulate them. How many times have you stood at your closet in the morning and thought, I wore that Tuesday so I can't wear it again today? For the majority of women our wardrobes are determined by what we imagine others will think, as much as they are by our own opinions. We see trendy clothes on others and wonder how they have time to shop so much. We go shopping with friends and are pressured into making a purchase we don't love or that costs too much. We try and style an outfit differently so that no one notices it's the same top we wore last week.

"But my clothes aren't expensive." You may have gotten great deals on your outfits, but do you need 35 of them? In a world of fast fashion that is dirt cheap, variety is the new expense. This is where dressing sensibly comes in. Is fast fashion and its offenses to rights of workers and the environment a sensible thing to be involved in? Some stores release new items every week with the intention of making you feel out of style and in need of a wardrobe update. Those who follow along and keep up with all the trends can inadvertently send this message to those that don't: You're out of style. You are not enough. You don't belong.

What if Paul was trying to promote an environment that was free from this kind of distraction? I am all for looking nice. But what if when we prepare for congregation we choose to focus on our hearts being in the right place, rather than our hair? What if we work to empower women in our congregations and churches to worship YHWH free from those plaguing thoughts of comparison? Just as we make sure to dress modestly to not distract men as they worship and learn the word of YHWH, we can dress financially modest to not distract women as they do the same.

What are your thoughts on this? Have you seen fashion becoming a contest at your congregation or workplace? How do you think this could affect our houses of prayer?

8 comments:

  1. To me I think the in todays world the more important message is not how expensive ones clothes are or if they have on some pretty jewelry...its if they are wearing things that are making people see the shape of their body. Low cut attire that can be enticing causing men to sin. I don't think they need to dress like a muslim woman or dress like with skirts that touch the ground but they should be dressing enticingly.

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    1. I agree with you that women (and men) shouldn't be dressed inappropriately, and that is a problem in much of western culture. That is a fair concern, but Scripture seems to be talking about another type of modesty in this case. The things Paul lists are typically of much more interest to women than men, so Scripture seems to be calling attention to the interactions between women and how they are influenced by dress. Can how a woman is dressed caused sins in other women, such as jealousy?

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  2. Shabbat shalom! I hadn’t thought of this scripture that way, but I think this is a good insight. I think especially at that time, a woman’s dress spoke volumes about her status, and she was judged, whether prestigious or lowly, based on it. And I think we fall some into it today as well. Modesty and purity are so much heart conditions, and I don’t think that’s taught enough. Thanks for the post!

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    1. Thank you so much Rachel Anne! I agree modesty and purity start in the heart and that's not something you hear much about today!

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  3. Great points! I never saw 1 Timothy 2:9 in the light of expensive clothing until now. Modesty and Humility do go together. My insecurities used to dictate how I dressed, now I dress to impress my Creator.

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    1. Thank you so much for your kind words! I love that sentiment!

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  4. Hello, I appreciated your article! I was curious if you have a recemended books on biblical femininity and modesty and other related topics. ?

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    1. My favorite book I've read that addresses Biblical femininity is Guardian Angel by Skip Moen. It's very different from most books on the topic!

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